Thursday, April 16, 2015


Travis and I have already announced this in a bunch of places, but this week it became officially official - this August we will be moving to St. Paul, MN where I have accepted a position teaching performance design at Macalester College!

I'm very excited for this job and for us to begin this new chapter in our lives (the cats aren't all that excited). But, there are many things that I will miss about Austin. This town has been my home for nearly 11 years. I don't know how we will go to normal movie theaters or where we will eat barbecue or Tex-Mex. Austin has changed so much in the time that we have been here, though, and lately I've been sounding like a Get-SXSW-Off-My-Lawn veteran Austinite.

It is our plan to continue the relationships we have in Austin and to come back as often as possible for creative work. It would be a dream come true to be able to call both cities our home bases (except live full time in the one where the cost of living isn't quadrupling every five minutes). Later this summer I'm sure I'll have plenty "Five Things I Will Miss About Austin" posts and am already coming up with my Austin Bucket List - things to do before we leave town. But, we have been here a long time, far longer than we were in San Francisco, and I am definitely ready for a new adventure.

Wednesday, April 8, 2015

Five Things: Notes After All of the Techs.

I have had a crazy three and a half months and have hit a three week window of lovely downtime. Catching up on reading, research for upcoming shows, games, hanging out with the cats, remembering that I have friends, and planning a very huge, very exciting, very SOON next chapter in our (Travis's, mine, the cats') lives.

1. Today is 4/8/15, and 4:23 flew by without me realizing the significance. In recognition and celebration of this auspicious day, which won't happen again for another 100 years, I direct you to Javier Grillo-Marxuach's "The Lost Will and Testament of Javier Grillo-Marxuach." It's an absolutely lovely piece about the show's early process and the creative process in general, and a sort of answer to those people who want black-and-white, who want to know yes-or-no, did you make it up as you went along? Because art doesn't work that way. LOST has a huge part of my heart. LOST reminds me of grad school, and inviting people over for pizza or chicken curry on Wednesday nights and bonding over this crazy show, and of the summer I interned at Cincinnati Opera and the company manager had to replace my TV on the night of the season 1 finale. For me, there will never be another LOST. There may be better shows (and there are, and have been - "Breaking Bad" was as close to perfect as a series can get from beginning to end) but they won't share the love, significance, and sentimentality in my life that this one did. Learning about how that was all created, the passion that went into it, the mechanics of it - beyond words fascinating and so familiar, even if I haven't been a part of a massively popular landmark television show.

2. Even though I have time off, I am unable to get back to the gym and unable to go running. Since January, I have teched and opened five shows, and my entire self-care routine has been disrupted. During focus for "Crime and Punishment" in March, I misjudged a step on the many-leveled set and went down about 12" landing on the side of my ankle. It was a pretty bad sprain, still swollen a month later. I had already decided to skip the Warrior Dash on March 21 (I signed up awhile back) and thankfully never registered for Tough Mudder. But I would really, really like to be able to manage the stress again, and my one attempt to work out this past Monday demonstrated that I still need to take it easy. AND. Since I have a couple of weeks off I am going to commit to strategizing diet & exercise for the next round of non-stop tech fun. This is an ongoing battle for me, figuring out how to eat, how to keep exercising when my usual routine is gone.
My foot, the day after.

3. I recently had a piece published on HowlRound, about the design process behind our January show "Deus Ex Machina," which was an enormous success. You can read the article here.

4. Travis and I went to see "It Follows" on Friday night. This led to a discussion and ongoing brainstorm (in my own head) about horror films, what is "scary," what "being scared" even is. I had expected (because of what I'd heard about the film) to be scared by the movie and really wasn't. There was one moment towards the beginning where I jumped, followed immediately by the thought "I am so tired of seeing women mutilated on-screen, even if it IS a trope and they're making use of it." I am not sure if the intention was to make me jump out of my skin, or to dramaturgically analyze the film, but I'm pretty sure that I can't do both at the same time. I have thought about what movies have scared me in the past, and there are two that I can honestly say scared the ever-loving s*** out of me, not only on the nights that I saw them but for years to come, and those movies are "2001: A Space Odyssey" and "The Blair Witch Project." In both cases it was the unknown, unexplained, ambiguous story/plot/endings that had me. At age 14 I wasn't really able to deal with a movie as non-literal as 2001, and not knowing what it meant - and you have to admit that the music and imagery are very ominous - kept me up at night for years. (I think my dad deeply regretted ever showing it to me.) "It Follows" had moments that tickled the same part of my brain that was terrified back then - there are several times when your eye catches someone in the background of the film and fixates on that person rather than on the actors in the scene, and that's pretty unsettling. The ending of Blair Witch is what had me in hysterics when I saw it in Augusta, Maine in 1999 - it's just a continual ratcheting of tension and suspense right up until a final image that took me awhile to digest and understand. That summer, I was an electrics intern at the Theater at Monmouth and my room was in an attic, in a house in the middle of nowhere. Walking up the stairs that night was terrifying - to get to the attic I had to pass a floor of the house that resembled (to me) the house at the end of the film, and for weeks after I was running up the stairs to avoid seeing that space. "It Follows" has one actually scary element in its mechanics, and that is the knowledge that once cursed in the movie, there is no escape, there is only putting off the inevitable gruesome ending as much as possible. THAT tension could have scared me. But by and large, "horror" movies don't. Travis believes that what I actually am experiencing is what he calls being "disturbed," not scared. Literal imagery doesn't do it for me, gore and violence doesn't, and knowing the resolution/entire plot/meaning of it all doesn't - take away those things, and you might be scaring me. Other movies that have scared me a bit: "The Others," "The Orphanage," Maya Deren's "Meshes of the Afternoon," "Picnic at Hanging Rock."
This will stick in your head for awhile.

This, to me, is different from how I feel about the absolutely revolting "body horror" movies. My reaction to the trailer for "The Human Centipede" was well-known for a number of years, and recently hearing Filmspotting's review of "Tusk" had me nearly reliving that. I haven't seen either film, but I know that I would not be ok if I did. Is that being scared? I don't know. Is it being disturbed? Oh yes, deeply, though it's not the same. It's not haunting. There's nothing there that is unclear, nothing that I don't understand, I am just very much not ok with those films.

To the people at Monmouth who dressed the blow-up doll in a flannel shirt and stood him in the corner of my room in the attic, I still haven't forgotten or forgiven. That was dirty.

5. Why do I keep reading post-apocalyptic dystopian fiction? I'm currently in the middle of "Station Eleven" by Emily St. John Mandel and LOVING it. I am beyond excited for "Seveneves" to come out next month. And David Mitchell, oh David Mitchell, you have unseated Haruki Murakami and become my favorite writer and it's largely due to this sprawling metaverse you're creating in your novels that extends through time, through the fall of mankind and its aftermath and is so spot-on that it feels like YES this is what is going to happen. It's a running joke with Travis and me now that he picks up a book I'm reading, reads the description on the flap and doesn't get past the words "dystopia," "post-apocalyptic," or somethingsomething feminist/exploitation of women.

And speaking of post-apocalyptic fiction, LOST and being unsettled, disturbed, and scared - the Southern Reach Trilogy is another recent read. I devoured those books in a couple of days and I don't know that they will ever leave my head.

Thursday, November 6, 2014

Adapting a Process.

This one might be boring to read to non design/theater nerds. This is about a part of my design process.

If there was ever a show that demonstrated so clearly just how important PROCESS is, it's "Deus Ex Machina."

"Deus" is an upcoming show (opening in January) produced by Whirligig Productions that will tell the story of the Oresteia, with a catch: the audience plays the part of the gods. When a character receives a prophecy, the audience determines what that prophecy is, thus affecting the choices made by that character and the narrative path of the rest of the play. The list of challenges this type of project poses for a lighting designer is long, and I'm adding to it daily. At the heart of that list is the fact that I'm not actually designing ONE show - I'm designing TWELVE, because there are twelve possible ways to move through the story.
One of the many ways this thing can go.
I'm still at the beginning of my design process for this show, and I have a dance piece to design before we go into tech, but I find that just about every scrap of "free time" I think I have gets redirected to "Deus." When I start a design, one of the first things I do is draft a preliminary cue sheet (I love Excel documents, seriously), which is basically a spreadsheet listing all potential lighting cues I'm currently envisioning for the show. This cue sheet will change a million times before opening, but having a sense of the number of cues, the movement of them, the different locations or moods or looks I need to create helps me in every other part of the process. And, normally, the first draft of the cue sheet takes me about as long as it does to a.) read the script once, uninterrupted and without distraction, just taking it all in, and b.) read the script a second time, marking possible cues and creating a spreadsheet listing them. In other words it usually takes me a few hours. For "Deus," those few hours turned into few days and might have even extended into weeks. It involved flow charts showing the different branches the story can take, and identifying the moments in the script where the lighting design would need to shift to reflect the new direction/intention/choice (not always the same place where the script itself branches). This was something that turned out to be much more complicated than I had thought it would be.

My cue sheet currently looks a bit like a Choose Your Own Adventure book - if Electra receives this prophecy, go to sheet x (the individual sheet within the Excel document - because each time it branches, I created a new sheet to keep the cues straight). The average performance of this - one time through one pathway - currently contains about 140 light cues; the reality is that I am writing almost 500. I've sat through a couple of readings of the play, some through all endings and some through only one, and each time I've been on my laptop the whole time, updating this list and modifying it; I can't guarantee that I will hear a particular path read again anytime soon, and it's much more efficient for me to work on the cue sheet during the read through then it is to do all of that work on my own later.
My cue sheets have never included flow charts.

When I'm not at the rehearsal, working on the cue sheet, I'm going through tons of visual research for the show. My favorite site to use for this is Corbis, but I also do use Google Image search, and I go through dozens of different search terms, anything from "Clytemnestra" to words that might describe the look of a place or the intentions of the characters at that moment ("desolate" was one I used after meeting with the director). For the record, I also use books, movies, TV shows, paintings, observation in the real world, and yes, LIBRARIES. I used to print every image out and put them on the walls of my studio, but my friends are slowly convincing me to live in 2014, where people don't print everything. I now create Pinterest boards for every show I'm working on and add images to them as I go. When it came time to meet with director Liz Fisher, I pulled the images that really spoke to me for each "world" in the script - for "Deus," we are essentially creating two "worlds," the world of the Palace at Argos and the world of the Oracle. The images that I use for inspiration will also change frequently as I work with the director and the rest of the design team. There is just as much revision here as there is of the cue sheet, and each time I'm trying to get more specific in how I want things to look.
I'm trying to kill fewer trees per show.
The point is - I have GOT to create a schedule for myself, and stick to it religiously. There is simply too much work to do in this show. Prior to meeting with Liz and attending the read throughs, there were 448 cues in my preliminary cue sheet. After, I had 479, and changes in the direction I was going for each world. Each time things change, or get more specific, it informs what I'm going to be drafting when I start on that light plot. And - it will help me survive the tech week for this huge project. I'm sometimes asked when it is I will begin work on a specific project, and when talking to someone outside of theater I usually explain that the tech process, just before opening, is when I'm working constantly at the theater creating the design, BUT the amount of work I put in in the weeks and months leading up to tech plays a huge role in determining how smoothly tech runs. I have to know the script inside and out, and I have to have a really good handle on what the team wants to do, and what my intentions are at each point in the play - creating a cue sheet and gathering research early on are what, for me, make this happen.

Frequently when I'm working on a project there is some wiggle room in the "schedule" I set for myself. If the first actual deadline that I need to meet for the production team is the light plot due date, then creating the cue sheet this weekend instead of tonight is completely possible. But I can't really take that chance on this one. We will have less than a week to tech this show, which, again, is actually twelve shows. And we aren't guaranteed to tech EACH INDIVIDUAL SHOW within those twelve. That lack of guarantee throughout - not knowing if I will get to read THIS version of the show again, or if I will even ever see THAT one - makes each reading of the script that much more important. With a couple of weeks between now and when the actors begin run throughs, I have a list of things I need to achieve in order to be able to use those next rehearsals in the best way possible. And this isn't the only project on my plate.

Additionally, and a bit unrelated - sticking to a process and creating a schedule for myself is what helps me to maintain the rest of my life - the part that includes family, friends, eating, sleeping, exercising, etc. Every show for me is part of this ongoing experiment in how I will maintain a healthy lifestyle while also being a lighting designer. Making sure that I have time to cook my own food is important; making sure that the one night in the next three weeks that my husband and I both have "off" is spent with him and not with work is important. I don't always succeed in maintaining that balance but I'm figuring it out.

Friday, October 10, 2014

Top 5 Pieces of Theater I Wish I Could See.

Yesterday I saw the news that Punchdrunk is planning an immersive theatrical experience in Los Angeles. A trip to LA, at some unidentifiable time in the future when I have more money and time off, seems completely doable, much more so than London. Within the past year there have been so many productions that I've been unable to see, because I am in Austin Texas and they are in Elsewhere. Aside from "The Drowned Man," here are a few others for which I would have happily bought a plane ticket, had it been possible:

1."Imagining O." This, more than anything else, I wanted/want to see - I hope that it's restaged or remounted at some point because I would happily travel to see it. The idea of an immersive Story of O...I don't know if I've heard of another work being developed as immersive theater that has intrigued me so much and made me wonder just how far the artists were going to push the boundaries of the audience members. And, as an aside, I would LOVE to create a performance inspired by O myself, as I think there's an interesting feminist take to be had there. Because as brilliant as Schechner is and as much as I want to see this piece, I am far more interested in a woman's perspective and voice on Reage's novel (the first piece of published erotica written by a woman? or at least with a fascinating backstory about the writer's identity and outrage around its subject matter) than I am in a man's. I've been brainstorming a couple of things and merging "O" with other images, stories, pieces of literature that I love. I don't know if it's "immersive" or "performance art" or installation but I've wanted to say SOMETHING about this book ever since I discovered it tucked away in props storage at Surflight Theater back in 2000. This is one of those projects that will probably kick around in my brain for a couple of years until I'm someday in the right place, financially and geographically and mentally, to create it.

"Imagining O"

2. "BrainExplode!" It's not really an immersive piece but definitely one in which the audience gets to exert some control over the play, using game mechanics in a fascinating way. I heard about this piece over the summer, and it was just one of those huge YES moments. The concept is so ridiculously simple and elegant. I would see this several times, and probably most of those would be just to watch the audience.

3. "STRATA." This piece was on the cover of American Theater Magazine last summer and wasn't around long enough for me to hop on a plane to Pittsburgh for it. The design is what struck me first, the image on the cover of the magazine was beautiful and I'm a huge sucker for immersive/interactive/non-linear work that is well-designed. Furthermore, STRATA played with giving the audience members a degree of agency over their journey that actually led to a number of different ways the show could progress.

4. "Fifth Column." If this extends...oh god. I'm going to London. Or moving there. I mean, all I hear about London theater lately are experiences like this. PS, my birthday is coming up, and they have the perfect one-of-a-kind gift.

5. "Ring." I saw this group's piece "The Bench" at Fusebox a couple of years back, and it was probably the first piece of theater I experienced that involved the "audience" wearing headphones and taking instruction on what to do next as the "performer." "Ring" dispenses with the visual elements entirely and leaves the audience with only sound and darkness.

 And also...
6. "GamerGate! The Musical." Please, dear god, someone make this.

Monday, October 6, 2014

Sexism, Entitlement, Art & Geek Culture.

I've been following #GamerGate for the past two months, despite my better judgement. It is, at turns, hysterical and infuriating and stressful. Hysterical because to the outside world, a lot of what has happened in this controversy looks absolutely ridiculous. Infuriating and stressful because unfortunately, it has actually affected quite a few actual lives, and not in a good way. During load in for one of my recent shows I told a friend, artistic director of a well-respected company in Austin, all about this "scandal," and it was quite satisfying. He is the type of person who doesn't pull punches when talking about the world around him and the oppression of different groups of people that is inherent in our culture. We had a good, long laugh at the idea that #GamerGate happened at all, that people are "fighting" this "battle" with the tactics that they are using. Given that #GamerGate started at the same time as the events in Ferguson, it was insane to us that energy and airtime was being given to this issue. My own twitter feed was like a surrealist piece of performance art - dueling threads about Ferguson and the oppression of white men in gaming culture. One seems like an actual problem, and the other like a whole lot of whining.

Except #GamerGate has had real-life impacts on the lives and careers of actual people, mainly women. The next time anyone at any college sits around wondering why it is that they can't get more girls interested in majoring in computer sciences, point them towards this issue. Why would they want to, if it meant risking this kind of treatment?

Katherine Cross's tweets, on women in the gaming industry leaving

It's not just a problem with gamer culture though, it's a larger problem with, I believe, geek culture. And it's not just a problem with misogyny (though that is a huge part of it). It's a problem of entitlement.

In so many of the pieces I've read about this controversy I see an angry group of people who want desperately to be taken seriously. And that's been true of the gaming medium for years. Many gamers wanted their hobby to be something more than the thing they did that was a waste of time, that was pure consumerism and entertainment and that parents and educators believed was worthless. Games were art, it was argued. And I agree: they are art. And the larger culture in recent years has accepted them as such. Games have now been included in the Smithsonian. Games have invaded how we create theater. Games are now part of advertising. Scholars write and speak about how games can actually improve the world around us.

Someone told me this guy's famous.
And now, gamers are mad. Because when what you do enters the realm of cultural criticism, it's subjected to the viewpoints of people who weren't looking at it before, weren't taking it seriously. It's exposed to feminist theory, queer theory, scrutiny from all angles by journalists, academics, other artists, prominent critics, women, men, people of color, the LGBT community. In short, people who may or may not have fallen under the traditional white male gamer demographic.

Guess what guys. You can't have it both ways. You can't expect the world to take you seriously and not at the same time subject you to cultural criticism. Filmmakers can't make movies without feminist scrutiny, favorite TV artists are criticized all the time. The growing awareness of how women have long been represented in media and art has led to us taking a hard look at rape culture and its effects. And games are a part of that. That is what you wanted when you asked to be taken seriously.

So games are now art - a viewpoint with which I wholeheartedly agree. Add onto that the fact that games now have a much wider, more diverse audience. Add onto that serious discussions about entitlement, rape, racism, queer issues, and the fact that people of different demographics want to be portrayed as diversely as white men have been for years.

You are not entitled to a seat at the big boy table of cultural discussion while simultaneously being allowed to not evolve with culture. No one is. The discussion is happening everywhere, not just in your niche. And by and large, in other mediums, when pieces of art are criticized on social issues the reaction is...wait for it...discussion. DISCUSSION. Not threats, not harassing, not huge online manifestos, not delusions of being qualified to "peer review" academic journal articles based on having played games lots (FYI - I have a terminal degree in my field, and I don't know if *I* am qualified to peer review something IN MY FIELD). I'm not saying that ridiculous sexism and misogyny doesn't occur in other media - it certainly does. Ask Jennifer Lawrence. But to take part in this, and to be taken seriously, you have to participate in civil discussion. You have to consider the other side. And until that happens, your movement is NOT going to be taken seriously. People outside of gaming culture will continue to laugh, continue to scratch their heads and wonder how the hell this got to be so "important," and people will CONTINUE to side with those who have been undeservedly harmed by members of your movement. You have to respond respectfully.

Just as the showrunners for Game of Thrones have to.
Just as every regional theater that produces seasons of largely white male playwrights has to. 

The Guthrie: All White Men, All The Time.
And you have to take a look at the way ANYONE is portrayed in your medium, and every medium is guilty of portraying women not as people but as things to win. You are not entitled to women, any part of them. Ever. I know that The Big Bang Theory has shown you that geek guys get the hot girl. I know, because I watched hours and hours and hours of that show while dealing with depression, that women in that show have been unfairly represented. There is one episode in particular that makes my blood boil. In it, Penny (who is of course blonde, beautiful, not regarded as very intelligent and never given a last name) reacts to Howard's outright gross misogynist comments in the way that she should, in the way that all women have at one time wanted to react to a man who thinks that catcalling is a compliment. She flat out rejects him, in not-very-nice words. And 15 minutes later is apologizing to him for it. I know you've been told that saying those things to women is ok, and the woman is overreacting and in the wrong. You are not entitled to the hot girl next door. I have seen, throughout this whole #GamerGate fiasco, references to parts of our bodies as though that's all we are, slut-shaming as though we aren't allowed to have private sex lives. I have personally been subjected to name calling (my favorite was being told I was a "batshit crazy penis-hater"), nowhere near the level of what some women have had to endure, for simply engaging in the discussion. This may be a vocal minority, but it is still a very visible part of your movement. And just as you have to take responsibility for how your art form is perceived by culture as a whole, you have to take responsibility for those within your party who are ruining your good time.

Just as Christians have to.
Just as FEMINISTS have to.
Just as any sub-culture, any group, has to deal with the fact that some of its loudest voices are the least attractive.

And you might want to consider not only distancing yourselves from the hashtag #GamerGate but outright rejecting it, and starting over. #GamerGate started with attempts to destroy the lives of two women. You can't recover from that, and claim that your movement is about ethics. You just can't. No one will take you seriously. You are not entitled to that.

Tuesday, September 23, 2014

Five Things: Updates from Guapa Tech

1. I'm really, really proud to say that my work on "Bethany" this past May was nominated for a B. Iden Payne award. There have been times in the past where I have thought, why are they recognizing this show? or, Why are they NOT recognizing this show? I don't this time. I feel that between "Sila," "Bethany," the remount of "Orchid Flotilla," "Still Now," and the current "Guapa," I've grown a ton as a designer this year and figured some things out that have in the past eluded me. It's also great to see friends and collaborators also nominated, including Glass Half Full and Trouble Puppet.

2. I am once again sick during a tech. This is the third time this has happened this year and HOPEFULLY (gives self stern look) I'll actually change a few things about my lifestyle now. While on the cruise I tried acupuncture for the first time, in order to stave off a headache that I had on day 1 (my headaches can actually go on for days). It was a pretty awesome experience. And it came with a free lecture on how I need to sleep more often and take time for myself every day. It would be great if I could figure out these things before December, the next time I have a show. The acupuncture experience was so great that I'm actually going to try to go regularly (as regularly as I can afford).

3. Jeff Vandermeer's "Southern Reach Trilogy" - I don't really know how to talk about these books without giving away so much of their disturbing nature. I'm only 20 pages or so into the third book at the moment, but my gut reaction so far is that this is the way nature might react to the damage caused by humans, if nature developed sentience. LOST meets Lovecraft. I am loving them.

4. This morning felt like the first day that fall arrives in Texas - this doesn't always coincide with actual fall starting. It's that great moment when you step outside your house and think - wait, do I need a jacket? Where IS my jacket? I'm about to head outside and find a spot to read so we'll see if it stuck.

5. I recently discovered the blog We Hunted the Mammoth. It's great, but I do need to limit my exposure as most of the posts make me pretty angry. Like this one. I honestly have to repeat to myself over and over that the people making noise like this, threatening women, being hostile, being hateful, whether it's with celebrities and their privacy or with gaming or with general feelings of entitlement and rejection, are a "vocal minority." That the internet fuels their anger and makes their voices louder. And anger is so addictive - that rush that you feel when you're in a rage and you're certain that you are right, and you want MORE of the rush so you continue to confirm your anger by reading or watching more. The internet feeds that. I don't think that it does in a manufactured way, like Fox News, which I'm pretty sure purposefully makes its viewers angry to keep them coming back to buy into a specific narrative that they are creating. I think instead it's just that by its definition the internet provides places for like-minded people to meet, talk, and be angry together. Anger fuels anger, they fuel each other, no one takes a step back to actually analyze their own reactions (or maybe in some/most cases aren't mature enough to do so), and it escalates until there are actual real harmful consequences. How do we combat that? I try, purposefully, to avoid cable news that skews towards the left because it does the exact same thing to me; and I try to not click on every single link that's going to tell me the latest news from the completely awful MRA world. My anger isn't going to defeat their anger and it doesn't improve the quality of my life one bit. But I do worry about how far this anger is going to take its addicts.

Thursday, September 11, 2014

Five Things: Updates from Still Now Tech

1. I'm still waiting to get pics from the remount of "The Orchid Flotilla" up on my site, but in the meantime we've gotten a couple of really great reviews, and even mentions of the lighting design!

From Broadway World: "THE ORCHID FLOTILLA unfolds in five parts that go from sunrise to sunset and spans 13 years of the woman's life. The performers/puppeteers are Caroline Reck and Gricelda Silva and they are both glorious storytellers. There may be no dialogue, but they say far more than words can with expression and movement. Underscoring the evening is a beautiful score by Adam Sultan and an exceptional sound design by K. Eliot Haynes. There is also a stunning lighting design by Megan Reilly. Each of the parts of this production shares an equal importance in telling this stunning, moving, ephemeral dream-story."

From "K. Eliot Haynes’ lovely sound design pairs with Megan Reilly’s dynamic lighting to create a world for the play that runs the gamut of playful, serene, and sad. These production elements saturate the performance with atmosphere and serve as profound backdrop for Reck’s movements."

We did this show in 2012 and it's been a favorite project of mine since, a piece that I love with all of my heart and hope as many people as possible get to experience. If you're in/around Austin, come see it before it closes September 20.

2. One year ago this week we brought Ygritte inside to live with us and forever torment Sansa and Asha. We found her living under our deck last summer, 4 or 5 months old. She is hysterical, sweet, and demonic. She drives everyone crazy and runs the whole house, and I'm pretty sure that Sansa still holds a grudge against me for bringing her inside.
Much less whiny after we got the cat tree.
3. I have become seriously addicted to American Ninja Warrior. Ever since I started getting in shape and trying to live a healthier lifestyle, I've been into the whole obstacle course race thing. I used to think that people who ran the Warrior Dash were insane, and I've now done it twice and am hoping to do the Tough Mudder in May. I didn't even know about ANW until Kacy Catanzaro's Dallas finals run went viral. Travis and I then caught up on every single run so far from the season and last night started watching stage two of the Las Vegas finals. (Do. Not. Tell. Me. Anything. I'm behind because of tech.) It's one of the most inspiring things I have ever seen, to be honest. This year for the first time, three women managed to complete the qualifying course; the fact that none of them made it to stage two of the finals is irrelevant. There is true support among these athletes, the positive energy is palpable through my television. They REALLY want to see each other succeed, and it has nothing to do with gender, height, age, or any other factor, though there may be MORE excitement when someone who seems disadvantages completes it. They regard each other as equals, no questions asked. It really does demonstrate almost everything I believe about feminism and equality: no, it's not fair. But women CAN do it, SHOULD train for it, and beat it ON ITS OWN TERMS. Watching Catanzaro, Meagan Martin and Michelle Warnky run makes me think about my own fitness and training, and whether the idea that women "can't" do this because of blah blah upper body strength is in fact a product of our culture convincing women NOT to work out. I'm involved in a fitness program at my job and have been for two years. One of the first things they told us was to get over the idea that if we, as women, went to the weight room we'd end up with huge ugly muscles. It actually irritates me that there has been some question of "fairness" involved since Catanzaro's run ended. I don't want more fairness in something like this, I want women to beat the game in front of them because they can.

4. I am pretty sure I saw some of the worst in humanity these past couple of weeks on the internet. I have been following #GamerGate and while I knew that the gamer community was misogynistic I didn't know HOW BAD until this occurred. And the one thing that I walk away from it feeling is that art has to stand up to criticism and discussion, and it's unreasonable to ask that games be taken seriously without it. And that's what I've seen - people who insist that games be taken seriously, usually as an art form (which I believe they are), are now harassing those that TRY to take them seriously. If you never want something that you love to face deconstruction and dissection and scrutiny from people in circles outside of your own, don't make it a THING. Keep it quiet, keep it to yourself. The second that art is shown to the public, the public (including critics, reviewers, writers and even (gasp) women) are going to respond. That's the point.

5. Tomorrow night, Shrewd Productions' "Still Now" opens at City Theater. The next day, Travis, Will and I are driving to Galveston to leave on a cruise for a few days. The cruise is sandwiched in between two techs for me. I plan to spend most of those five days sitting by a pool, reading Jeff Vandermeer's Southern Reach Trilogy, and drinking margaritas. See also: my first time trying SCUBA diving and hiking Mayan pyramids. The day after we return, I focus "Guapa."